Joey's Birth Story

Scarlette Jo on her Birthday

Since my first post, I’ve gotten a lot of questions from friends and family about whether or not I “really want to be a midwife.” Well, with Scarlette Jo's first birthday being tomorrow, I thought it might be a good time to share the experience that started me on this journey. Joey’s “birth”day. 

Right before we left for the hospital

         When I woke up on Saturday the 13^th I knew that the I’d be going into labor soon. I wasn’t having strong contractions, my water hadn’t broken, but I just knew that it would happen within the next 24 hrs.  After having a horrible experience with my obgyn, I refused to go to the hospital until my water broke, so I decided that until that happened, I needed to stay busy.  Tanner, Serenity and I had a nice day out together.  We spent the whole day running errands, playing ball, and house hunting, all to take my mind off of the pregnancy.  That night, we went to a friend’s house and just relaxed, I noticed I was contracting regularly, like I had been all week, but it wasn’t painful so I ignored it. We got back to the house about midnight. While bringing Serenity into the house, she woke up.  Imagine that.  As I was getting everyone ready for bed, Tanner said to me, “Tonight would be a really inconvenient night for you to go into labor because I’m tired.” LOL Scarlette MUST have sensed it, because when he left the room to go brush his teeth, I felt a pop, and knew my bag of water just broke.  Not much came out, so had I not been paying attention, I honestly could have missed it, BUT since I had been waiting all day for that to happen, I was ready.  Within minutes I felt the contractions starting to pick up, but since Serenity wasn’t born for another 10 hours after my water breaking, I thought I had time to put Reni to bed still.  I told Tanner I’d go to the hospital once she was asleep and after I fixed my hair HA.  I guess he didn’t think it was a good idea, so he insisted I give Serenity to my mom, so we could go right away.  It was 1:20 am and I thought it was a bad idea to wake my mom up if I didn’t have to, but I quickly fixed my hair and gave the baby to my mom so we could go.  As I was getting in the car, I felt the first big contraction, the kind that kind of takes your breath away, I knew things were speeding up. Instead of being worried, or stressing out about getting to the hospital, I just relaxed. I wasn’t afraid of going into labor, I wasn’t anxious about it, I was super calm, and just decided it would be better to go with the flow, then let myself freak out.  I wasn’t in pain yet, so I decided until I felt the HORRIBLE pain everyone talks about, there was no need to get worked up.

         We got to the hospital and I remember writing down 2 am as our “check in” time. The triage nurse came and collected us, and asked me if I needed a wheel chair, but I didn’t feel that was necessary.  After all, I was there to have a baby, not to set a broken bone or something… Tanner and I got settled in the triage room and the nurse finally started talking to us at about 2:15am.  She checked me and said I was dilated to a 7, and 100% effaced.  Turns out, this nice lady wasn’t a Labor and Delivery nurse at all, and this wasn’t even her hospital, she was just filling in for the night.  She called the doctor who was on call, and I guess the doctor was in no hurry to come to the hospital so she told the nurse the baby probably wouldn’t be born until about 5am, but to hurry up and get me an iv and an epidural.  

Scarlette Jo's first picture

I honestly didn’t want to get an epidural, but if the baby wasn’t coming for a few more hours, and the “real pain” hadn’t hit yet, maybe I needed one.  They didn’t really ask me what I wanted, but I was tuning everyone out anyways, I just needed to focus on the baby.  The contractions were getting much stronger, still not painful, but only a minute apart, I was concentrating more on my body, then the conversation, but I remember telling the nurse the contractions were getting more intense. When she saw they were only a minute apart she franticly got me moved to the labor and delivery room at about 2:30.  The nurses were all surprised how calm I was.  They all mentioned that I did not seem like I was in labor at all.  As the nurses all tried to get the IV in, I realized I was not going to be getting an epidural.  She was coming. I felt her.  I needed to push, or so I thought.  The horrific pain I was expecting hadn’t hit me yet, so in my mind, it couldn’t possibly be time for that.  The next contraction was INTENSE, I waited to catch my breath and said as loudly as I could “she’s coming.” It became apparent this nurse truly wasn't L&D, because she said to me, “ok honey, just breathe, I’ll check you in a second.” She then started “showing me” how I was supposed to breathe. SERIOUSLY lol. A couple seconds later the nurse checked, and in complete shock said, “There’s the head!” WELL YEAH, isn’t that what I just said?  “Don’t push,” she says. Yeah right!!! The next contraction came, just as intense but still not painful, and I ignored her and decided to push! The nurse said, “look down, there’s your baby."  At the last possible second she reached down, and I looked just in time to see her grab little Joey at 2;43am.   

Moments after she was born

At this point the L&D nurses made it in the room. Scarlette was laid right on top of me, this sweet little 5lb baby.  It was the most incredible experience of my life.  I had no medication, a nurse that had no clue what she was doing, there was no doctor to be found, I had never taken a “birthing class” and I was fully capable of delivery my baby, all on my own.  The rude, condescending doctors, my nurses who seemed more focused on protocols then people, the millions of test they want you to do, the movies, and stories that tell women the pain and whole process in general is too much to handle, that we need doctors to fix us, none of it was true.  None of it.  Little Joey was here, and we did it all on our own. It was a the most spiritual, serene, and wonderful moment I’ve experienced.

 

Only a few minute old

 

Scarlette Jo and her sweet Daddy!

The past few years, being pregnant for almost two full years straight, moving across the country, and so many other changes, have been full of so much uncertainty. Looking back, it seems all those struggles were just molding me to be ready to recognize how important it is for me to go to school to be a midwife.  I truly feel our little Joey came into our lives so quickly after Serenity so that I could have this experience because I needed to learn certain things about myself to lead me to pursue this dream.  It seems everyday, I’m reassured that even though I may not know what the Lord has planned for my family and me, there IS indeed a plan.  I hope I can be faithful enough to always recognize it!

            Jess